ginger snap

they told me no one cared about me in saliva-shut envelopes
sent me away to sit alone with their lies tucked inside my sleeves with bloody and snotty tissues
and it’s not 3, i was wrong
it’s 4, it’s 7, it’s 84
breaking me up like ginger snaps, a piece for you and a piece for you a piece for you and another piece for you
save the crumbs for me, everyone feasts

sit on a bed in the bright darkness with the lamp off
you tell me there’s nothing i should care about because nothing matters to anyone else
and a caught out lie is an accusation of character — lies are secrets you stir inside you while dinner cooks on the stove and your knuckles bruise
it’s 3 days without food because lies keep you full—————

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pretend people

 

everyone i’ve ever met has told me the same small secret with their mouth shut
wanted the same quick ending for me
breaking conversations with silence — ‘don’t you know how boring yyou are?’
looks around the table like it’s time to stop now,
stop in two ways
my only purpose is being their idea of a waste of space.
the three voices
they’re all real and i’m stuck in a pretend place