if i named you by name, you would take me as another trophy
maybe your favourite collected effort trophy
even though one of you is missing, gone,
i wish you could drown without drowning
so you could feel what it feels like to be your product
while you remain fake free
(but you’re lying in knee-deep water


ginger snap

they told me no one cared about me in saliva-shut envelopes
sent me away to sit alone with their lies tucked inside my sleeves with bloody and snotty tissues
and it’s not 3, i was wrong
it’s 4, it’s 7, it’s 84
breaking me up like ginger snaps, a piece for you and a piece for you a piece for you and another piece for you
save the crumbs for me, everyone feasts
you tell me there’s nothing i should care about because nothing matters to anyone else
and a caught out lie is an accusation of character — lies are secrets you stir inside you while dinner cooks on the stove and your knuckles bruise
it’s 3 days without food because lies keep you full—————

thankless (careless)

i am done throwing adoration and care into a thankless void
and being met with silence

an expired ticket for respect
never spent

hands that butterfly my ribs,
dissect my heart
just to see if I would feel it

the devil said to you I don’t, but I do
I feel it all

the void laughs itself to sleep